Out of Control

As soon as we’re unable to let out all our weird thoughts and feelings, we begin hiding parts of ourselves.

It’s good to practice restraint, of course, and not constantly flail around with big emotion, but we are emotional beings. Artists are especially in tune with that internal emotional terrain we all have, so we tend to seek release quite frequently. As vessels of emotional truth, forever trying to bridge the gap between the inside and outside worlds, our own personal emotions can sometimes feel out of control. Actually, they often are out of control.

And I love it that way. Now to practice not caring when people push back or dismiss my emotional self.

I’m beginning to recognize the people and moments in my life that tell me to get smaller.

I’m beginning to see when people are trying to tame my expression of self in order to fit it into their own box of understanding.

I’m beginning to stop myself from listening to and taking advice from people who are obviously so scared of themselves that they leap to judging others.

I’m an expressive person, and I am also a respectful person. The two can coexist.

We don’t have to be mean to be “out there”. We can be out there and be kind. Often kindness paired with confidence gets misinterpreted as danger. Suddenly there’s someone who’s not only generous with their empathy and patience, but also a bit strange, and people get weirded out. A lot of people don’t trust kindness coming from those who are what we were told as children not to be: emotional.

Give yourself permission to feel. During this pandemic, of course, and every day after.